Our God is a God of Order!!!

It is with great joy and excitement that I share this with you all. I confess to you, my sisters (and brothers), that I used to be a very messy person. I happily say "used to be!" I used to leave things around everywhere. If I fixed a meal for myself, and my dad would walk in... he could practically follow the steps of everything I did... and he'd proclaim "Allie was here!" And I'd feel like a failure all over again. Just once I wanted to remember to pick up after my cooking or eating, reading or crafts...

Worst of all was my room. By nature and upbringing, I'm not a messy person. But I'd fallen into a depression that manifested itself, among other ways, in a rather neglected room. While I enjoyed cleaning and organizing, something inside of me kept me from doing it for myself. Perhaps I felt I didn't deserve the calm of a neat and tidy living space... maybe I was holding on to teenage irresponsibility? I sincerely do not know what reason or reasons I had for going day to day the way that I did.

I was sore and ached, depressed, feeling pathetic... and my knees were in almost unbearable pain... I only share this part because of the first of two events that led to a complete turnaround in this area of my life.

I was in a Bible Study, and I asked God why my knees were in such horrible pain. What had I done? I hadn't injured them, that I knew of... there was no real explanation. As I asked and pleaded, I was for some reason in the book of Hebrews and found my way to Hebrews 12:12-13... (Now I'm a BIG proponent of using scripture in context...so feel free to read the whole passage! I know there's a much greater message in this passage, but at the moment this is what jumped out to me.) "Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed."

I read that verse, and it was as if God were telling me, "here's why your knees are weak...and here's what to do to keep it from getting worse. If you don't do this, you will wish you only had weak knees."

I was later to read the rest and learn even more about how to strengthen my walk with my Lord, but for now this was what I needed to do. Still I didn't have a desire to clean. It was not until I visited with two friends of mine who own their own homes, and keep them lovely, tidy and neat, that I decided it was time to grow up and take control of my living space.

But it wasn't just a clean room that I wanted... I wanted the desire and ability to create habits that would last for the rest of my life. I didn't want a temporary fix... I wanted a life change. So I prayed that God would instil in me habits that would lend themselves to continual organization and cleanliness.

With these changes have come a realization I never expected!!!

Galatians 5:22-23
But the fruit of the Spirit is:

Love- Having a clean room has given me the ability to think clearly and love honestly without over-extending myself.

Joy- Having a clean room has literally provided the possibility for true joy! I can walk into my room and smile in my heart.

Peace-Having a clean room has created a space for peace. Having this time in my room to rest and relax and instill peace allows me to be more at peace in other areas of my life.

Patience-it takes patience to make my bed EVERY morning... The old me used to say "I have no company coming to see me... and I'm going to unmake it tonight anyway... why bother?" But by patiently setting aside a little more time each moment to put things back where I found them, is teaching me patience in the bigger things in life as well!

Kindness- the peace and joy and patience that maintaining a clean living space has given me is also adding up to general kindness to my family, friends, and complete strangers. It is true...the fruits of the spirit go hand in hand in hand...

Goodness-Having a clean room actually keeps me from thinking too much about myself, and allows me to think more of others and to be able to help others more freely.

Faithfulness-Getting the big ball of failures of the messy room out of the way, is allowing me to create routines and faithfully be in the Word daily. It also allows me more time to be fully focused on what He wants to show me in His Scriptures!

Gentleness - I've noticed the way I even handle the possessions I have now has a feel of gentleness, and it is also (hopefully) showing itself in my character and treatment of others. I have a stronger sense of when I'm not acting as a child of God should, and it is much harder to let any temper get out of hand without my feeling an overwhelming conviction on the matter.

Self-control-The desire to keep my room clean has led me to have self control in what I use in my room, when I use it, and what I do with it afterward... I used to try on multiple pieces of clothing and, just like in the movies, throw them on the bed or over my head onto the floor... then in the rush of getting to where I needed to be, I'd leave them all there with the self-promise to take care of it later... now I put thought into each thing I take out of my closet, and I have to exercise the self control to put it back where it all belongs once I'm done.

against such things there is no law.

I'm really not sure yet what God wants me to do with this new-found wisdom and growth, but I know He doesn't plan to waste it. I praise Him for allowing me to become a woman who seeks to serve Him by learning to serve others and maintain a living space that reflects His character!!

Jesus is my Night Light

Hey everyone!!

Yeah yeah yeah, I know, it's been a super, crazy, long time since I've been on here. Truth be told, for once it's because so much good has been happening, I'm having a hard time keeping up with it all! I will do my very best to get a post out about that soon.

But for today, I have an entirely different little treat. I am cleaning out my closet (again)... going through all my stuff (again) and deciding (again) what I (still) need or really want to keep...

As daunting as this task is (we're talking about me keeping all of the things I have held onto through the years, the things mom has given me to keep, and the things I actually use at least on a weekly basis)... I actually enjoy tackling the monster that is my closet. For me it's a trip down memory lane. You'll see on my facebook profile, a few pictures of things I came across last time. Well, this time I went a little deeper into the things I chose to keep, and came across some more gems.

Like the writing assignment I had in the 2nd grade, about my hero. "My hero is Jesus. He perfomed many miracls. He bied, yes He actualy died just for us and when He rose from the dead he actually Left the Holy Spirit just for us. He stood upon the Mountans, to speek and teach the peolpe to pray. Jesus is very special to me. What about you." (Yes, those misspellings are from the original... far too adorable to correct.)

How wonderful it was that I knew even then the simplicity of the gospel... and it's still just that simple!

I also came across this poem I'd written. I strangely remember quite vividly the day I wrote it, though I don't remember when it was.

Jesus is my Night Light

Jesus is my night light
Through the dark He shines
Jesus is my teacher
Teaching me to make straight lines
Jesus is my buddy
Showing me the rocks He finds
Jesus is my night light
Through the dark He shines

Jesus is my night light
Helping me through scary nights
Jesus is my guardian
protecting me from big school fights
Jesus is my sheild
Scaring off my biggest frights
Jesus is my night light
Helping me through scary nights

Jesus is my night light
So the darkness never wins
Jesus is my treehouse
Protecting me from worldly winds
Jesus is my savior
Came to save me from my sins
Jesus is my night light
So the darkness never wins

Lessons from Titanic

Anyone who knows me knows that I love old movies. The Turner Classic Movie channel (TCM) is my favorite channel on cable. This comes in handy at the library. I am far more likely to track down an old black & white film in the shelves than anything else. And if there is one thing the library has plenty of, it’s old black & white films! The other day I decided to search out some more Cary Grant films. In my searching the shelves I came across “A Night to Remember” the 1958 film about the tragedy of the Titanic. I’d only seen bits and pieces through the years, and I decided I should watch it in its entirety.

The film was beautifully made. Void of the “Jack and Rose” fictional love story, this film truly captured the sentiments surrounding the incident. The film was successful in explaining a lot that I never knew. For example, according to the film, there was a ship that was incredibly close to the RMS Titanic. The doomed steamer tried multiple times to make contact, and the ignorant crew didn’t even respond to the cries for help. They observed the emergency flares, wondering why such a large liner would be firing them, instead of coming to their aid.

But what stunned me the most was the way the passengers treated the situation. To be sure, at the beginning the crew decided to be calm about the situation, so as not to cause a panic. They simply started telling people to put on their life jackets and head to the outside, “just as a precaution.” Most of the first class passengers didn’t want to, and the film did a great job listing their various reasons. Some simply didn’t want to because they found it uncomfortable. It was too chilly outside. It was an inconvenience that they didn’t feel they should be obligated to accept.

Then, as the situation became a little more obvious, the women and children had begun to be allowed onto the lifeboats. A few excuses for not going on board were revealed. One that comes to mind was the woman who was afraid because she had never gotten into a lifeboat before, and she was certain she would miss her step coming aboard. She saw how far down the water was, with the other lifeboats that were already safely in the water. She screamed out of fear, but she made it safely. As the transitions between the class passengers and the “steerage” passengers began, I heard one woman say, “I will not sit with them, they’re steerage!” Some boats were lowered with too few people. There a few examples shown where people insisted there was no room, when there was clearly plenty.

Anyone who has seen either Titanic film will remember “the Unsinkable Molly Brown.” In both films, we see her as an assertive, women’s liberation sort of woman. Not traditional in any sense, all of her actions ignoring status and seeking to be as helpful as possible. In one instance, she insists on allowing more people into the boat, saying everyone can make some more room to get someone else into the boat. After the ships sinks, she suggests their boat go back to help those left in the water. She even convinces the women to row as well, so they can stay warmer by moving their bodies.

Perhaps the strangest account, and whether it is true or not, was a woman who had to run back to her room and get her “lucky pig” a porcelain painted pig… rather large for a good luck charm.

As I watched I found myself screaming at the television as if I were watching a football game (and actually caring about the outcome). “PEOPLE! THE SHIP IS SINKING! GET OVER YOURSELVES!!!”

Sure it seems pretty obvious. We’d all like to believe we’d be a little more like Molly Brown. But in reality, I’m pretty embarrassed to say I see myself a whole lot more in the other passengers. I’ve been guilty of making all these same excuses, and more, to avoid stepping out and telling others about the abounding love of Christ.

“That person wouldn’t listen to me.”

“It’s inconvenient, I’ll be late for Bible Study!”

“This is too scary, what if I fall flat on my face?”

I have been completely guilty of taking God’s gift of grace for granted and keeping it all to myself, keeping the lamplight under my hand as they say.

One question that stuck out in my mind was, “how could the selfish first class passengers survive, and the poor third class “steerage” passengers not make it? How is that fair?” But then I realized, those passengers would have to live the rest of their lives knowing that for whatever reason they survived while others didn’t, simply because of status, nothing at all to do with who deserved to live and who didn’t. The same is true for us. We did nothing to deserve this grace we've been given. But hell is a reality. It’s not a theory, it is truth. There’s no going back, no changing your mind, no doing it over again differently. Do we really believe that about the eternal destinies of those around us?

The overwhelming truth is that the ship IS sinking. It’s sinking fast. Faster than any of us realize. Every day, people are dying without knowing who Christ even is, let alone how much they need Him.

Let us not be the born-again “first class” passengers

YOUR Relationship with God

Every night, for as long as I can remember, my grandmother has said to me, "Goodnight, Alex. God bless you." When I was younger, I used to get very confused... "But, grandma... I didn't sneeze!" I didn't quite get it.

Then, when I got older, I began to learn what it meant to say to someone, "God bless you." I learned it's not just something to say when someone sneezes... Now, although I'm 23, sometimes when she says "Goodnight, Alex. God bless you," I say, "Ah-choo!!!"

To some, that may seem disrespectful, but in my relationship with my grandmother, it's a sweet reminder of my childhood.

Your relationship with your grandparents may be completely different from mine, I know your relationships with your friends aren't all exactly the same... we were wired by God to love in different ways! (Read the Five Love Languages sometime...)

Just as a recap, the five love languages are: words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, physical touch (shout out to all my huggers!) and acts of service.

I was smiling last night, thinking about how rude it would sound to someone else for me to say "ah-choo" to my grandmother when she is genuinely speaking God's blessing over me, and it made me think about what it means to have a personal relationship with God.

Deep, meaningful relationships take time. They are always different in some way. They are unique. Some may seem deeper than others... some spend time with God outdoors in His creation, some prefer the quiet of their bedroom, some go to a coffeehouse... some write their praises, some sing them, some paint them...

Don't envy the relationship someone else has with God. He has the capacity to love us each individually and uniquely. Wait in anticipation of deepening your relationship with Him, not simply striving to love Him like your friend or teacher does... Relationship takes time, and God has all the time you both need to build a relationship fit for eternity!

ThanksGIVING

Hello friends, I know it has been a long long LONG time since I posted. I've had a few thoughts to share, but every time I was about to write it down, something always took my attention away from it... what a coincidence, eh? NOT...

But, while I do have a few ideas still cooking in my head for some posts (stay tuned for a series on my take on the "love languages" of God), For right now I want to alert you all to a need I became aware of this Thanksgiving.

My mom found a single mom who is in an extremely tough spot right now. She just got back to the states with her two daughters, ages 9 and 15. The three of them came to spend thanksgiving with us. She just used her very first check to get them a place to live. Now they have a place, but nothing to put into it. no dressers, nightstands, lamps, you name it. Perhaps it would be easier to tell you what they DO have...

three mattresses (no box springs, no bed frames, JUST the mattresses)
a green plastic lawn table for a "dining room table"
a few metal folding chairs to sit on
and she JUST got a little money for some pots...but not a whole lot of food for those pots to cook.

So, here's my request and challenge to you. Below, I have the specific list of things they brainstormed thanksgiving night, though I'm sure they need more than this. Please look into your hearts, your belongings, anything you can think of, and ask God to guide you in your decision on what, or even whether or not, to donate.

(3) Boxsprings, (2 twin size, 1 full size)
(3) Bedframes (2 twin, 1 full)
(1) Living room set (e.g. sofa, end tables, maybe cocktail tables? bookshelves...look at your living room, what do you have in it?)
(1) Dining table
(2) Dressers
(2) Chests of Drawers
(2) Lamps
(2) Nightstands
(1) Microwave
(1) Toaster
(1) Mixer
(1) Blender

If you can give any of these (or maybe publix gift cards for groceries, or cash donations - my mom is quite craigslist savvy and can find most if not all of this stuff very easily), please comment here or e-mail me at Godprovides2008@yahoo.com.

If any of our Restorers of Streets are reading this, please consider this as a great way to cap off our month's focus on single mothers! She's our sister in Christ, and she just needs a little help in this area. And I cannot give too much info about the job she has, but suffice it to say she would be a great connection to have if we truly want to help the needy in our community! My mom knows her personally, and we have seen the situation they're in, it's absolutely real.

They really are a great family, the girls are very sweet and sharp, with quick quick wit! Believe me, this is a hard working family who deserves our help!

P.S. My step-dad has a pick-up truck, so if you have any of the furniture, he has already told me he would be more than happy to come pick it up in his truck, so you don't even have to worry about bringing it to me! See how easy? Please, guys, lets make this holiday season special for this family!

For those who don't know what I meant by Restorers of Streets, read Isaiah 58, then pray about how you can contribute. Thanks everyone, I know we can all come through for these three amazing women!

The Sun Came Up Today

I was working yesterday all alone for the first time, minus the two cats who decided they didn't like me so much... And I got to thinking...random thoughts... about church and work and family and friends and music and food... haha.

Then I started thinking, for whatever reason, about how I wanted to go help set up with the worship night we had last night with Refuge. I thought about how much time and effort it takes to put an event like that together. All the pre-planning, finding the time and date, getting materials, organizing the program, setting up, going through the event, and tearing down safely and efficiently. I thought about all the things that go into making church happen on Sunday morning. And my brain went reeling.

Then God jumped into the conversation. "Do you know how much it takes for the sun to come up in the morning?"

I thought about what it would take us to do that. We'd need trillions upon trillions of dollars for a track to hold our orbit in place, scientists to monitor the rate of motion, repair astronauts for keeping the track greased, agreement between all nations as to what time the sun should peak their horizon. Then all of a sudden everything would come to a standstill because the Earth's office CEO is placing bets against the Sun's office CEO...and an affair with his secretary... then we'd all try to catch all the news on TV, but that wouldn't happen because earth has stopped moving during deliberation, and one side of the earth burns and the other freezes...

Yes, my brain was running a mile a minute...

Then I realized just how much it takes for God to do it... He simply looks at the sun and says "ok Sun, go do your thing," and it happens. See how easy that was?

Psalm 8:3,4 "When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him?"

How incredible! He's got the time to keep everything spinning in perfect motion, and is thinking of us the whole time!

God, You are all we need, You are all we truly have. Forgive us when we doubt Your ability to help in our time of need. Rescue us from anxiety. Help us to remember, You've got it covered! We thank You, Father, for being our everything!

Caro Gesu' Ti Scrivo

This was one of my favorite songs last time I was in Italy (11 years ago...I was 12) Just tracked it down and decided to share it with everyone!!

Caro Gesù ti Scrivo

(“Zecchino d’oro” 1997 - musica e testo: M. Piccoli)

Caro Gesù ti scrivo per chi non ti scrive mai,
Dear Jesus, I write to you for those who don't
per chi ha il cuore sordo bruciato dalla vanità,
For those whose hearts are burned and deaf from vanity
per chi ti tradisce per quei sogni che non portano a niente,
For those who betray You for dreams and lead nowhere
per chi non capisce questa gioia di sentirti sempre amico e vicino.
Because they don't understand the joy of having You forever with them as their Friend

Caro Gesù ti scrivo per chi una casa non ce l'ha,
Dear Jesus I write to You for those who have no home
per chi ha lasciato l'Africa lontana e cerca un po' di solidarietà,
For those in Africa, near and far, for some solidarity (not sure about this one, going to double check with dad what this line actually is trying to say)
per chi non sa riempire questa vita con l'amore e i fiori del perdono,
for those who don't fill this life with love and the beauty of forgiveness
per chi crede che sia finita, per chi ha paura del mondo che c'è
For those who think it's all over, and are afraid of the world that is.
e più non crede nell'uomo.
And no longer believe in humanity

Gesù ti prego ancora:
Jesus I beg you again:
vieni a illuminare i nostri cuori soli,
Come and bring light to our lonely hearts
a dare un senso a questi giorni duri,
to make sense of these hard days
a camminare insieme a noi.
and walk with us
Vieni a colorare il cielo di ogni giorno,
Come and color our sky each day
a fare il vento più felice intorno,
bring joy in the wind (loose translation)
ad aiutare chi non ce la fa...
And help those who don't have the faith.

Caro Gesù ti scrivo perché non ne posso più
Dear Jesus I write beause I can't take anymore
di quelli che sanno tutto e in questo tutto non ci sei tu,
Of those who know everything and yet don't know You.
perché voglio che ci sia più amore per quei fratelli che non hanno niente,
Because I want there to be more love for our brothers who have nothing
e che la pace, come il grano al sole, cresca e poi diventi pane d'oro
And that peace, like grain in the sun, would grow to be made into golden bread
di tutta la gente.
for all people.

Gesù ti prego ancora:
Jesus I beg you again:
vieni a illuminare i nostri cuori soli,
Come and bring light to our lonely hearts
a dare un senso a questi giorni duri,
to make sense of these hard days
a camminare insieme a noi.
and walk with us
Vieni a colorare il cielo di ogni giorno,
Come and color our sky each day
a fare il vento più felice intorno,
bring joy in the wind (loose translation)
ad aiutare chi non ce la fa...
And help those who don't have the faith.


Signore vieni! Signore vieni!
Lord Come! Lord Come!